A Year of Handmade

Last spring, I had the pleasure of meeting Anne of Flax and Twine at Squam–an art workshop in New Hampshire. Since then, I’ve been happily subscribed to Anne’s blog and constantly inspired by her ideas, enthusiasm, and skills.

For 2012, Anne has committed to making all of her gifts. Yep, a year of handmades. I love the idea. I made many gifts last year, but hope to make even more this year (family and friends, you’ve been warned). I love receiving handmade gifts. I so very much appreciate the care and thought that goes into something made with intention and time. As Anne mentioned in her blog, “It is this effort that bestows handmade gifts with value in ways that store-bought gifts just cannot have.”

I also want my children to grow up to appreciate handmade things. Receiving, yes, but  more importantly making and giving. I want them to have confidence in their creative ideas and abilities and to find enjoyment in the process.

With Christmas 2011 over and an entire year ahead of me, I’m also committing to a year of handmades. Are  you in?

 

Autumn

I had a lovely yoga class last night led by Kim Wagaman at It’s All Yoga. At the beginning of our practice, Kim read “Song for Autumn” by Mary Oliver. With autumn finally settling into Sacramento, the timing of the poem was a perfect and gentle reminder to appreciate the change of the season and–at the same time–take peace and comfort in just how grounding this change is. For your enjoyment, as well:

Song for Autumn by Mary Oliver

In the deep fall
don’t you imagine the leaves think how
comfortable it will be to touch
the earth instead of the
nothingness of air and the endless
freshets of wind? And don’t you think
the trees themselves, especially those with mossy,
warm caves, begin to think

of the birds that will come — six, a dozen — to sleep
inside their bodies? And don’t you hear
the goldenrod whispering goodbye,
the everlasting being crowned with the first
tuffets of snow? The pond
vanishes, and the white field over which
the fox runs so quickly brings out
its blue shadows. And the wind pumps its
bellows. And at evening especially,
the piled firewood shifts a little,
longing to be on its way.

Right now

It’s the first week of summer vacation. It’s a time of transition. Of a new rhythm to our days. We have our plans and activities (and free time). With any transition and change, however, comes some friction. Don’t get me wrong, we’re all just fine. But, as we (the kids and I) adjust to being together even more than before, I’m trying to be grateful and observant, and ever mindful. Right now, I’m grateful for:

• a cancelled work trip
• friends eager to get together on a regular basis to keep ourselves and our kids sane throughout the summer
• cooler temperatures (it should only be 90 today, rather than 100)
• time to sew
• time to run, swim, and practice yoga
• a good therapist
• family
• pools–public and private–and access to them
• an ice maker in the freezer
• popsicles
• a breeze

I hope you’re finding something to be grateful for today, as well.

Summer, part II

One of the things I didn’t mention in my post about summer last week, was that I’d be single parenting it much of the time. Margie’s job requires her to travel a great deal during the summer months. Much of that travel had to be delayed because of California’s oddly cold and wet spring. With hot, dry weather finally here, delayed work trips and current ones can finally begin.

Part of the need for my summer schedule is born out of trying to stay sane during these weeks and months. Of course all of this is happening despite my new resolve to carve out more creative time for myself. But duty calls. And my job—while Margie is doing her’s—is to be with the kids.

Working with these conditions—solo parenting and the need for creative time—I’ve identified some ways to try to keep myself fulfilled over the coming months:

• Ask for help. Mama-friends, you’ve been warned.
• Create throughout the day. I already try to do this. It will be imperative that I actually do it now. The kids are generally good at keeping themselves occupied when I sit down to knit or sew. I need to take advantage of this.
• Eat well. I’ve largely kicked my sugar habit. In an attempt to maintain this, chocolate generally won’t be invited in.
• Sleep.
• Wake early and well before the kids wake-up. I already do this, as well. Unfortunately, I tend to stay up later when Margie is out of town which makes getting up early harder. If I heed the bullet point above, however, I should be able to maintain my early mornings.
• Drink little. Alcohol that is. I’m not a huge drinker, but with summer comes pool parties and more social engagements. Drinking makes me cranky and groggy and not a very happy person.  And well, I’ll be driving children around. Enough said.
• Time to myself on the weekends. It’s time to implement this. In fact, we started last weekend. Margie took the kids for the morning. I got time—at home—to myself.
• Mandatory quiet or nap times. Again, something we already do. But with Bennett home again during the nap/quiet time and Adelaide fazing her nap out, we’ll be re-assessing and finding the right type of quiet time for the summer months.
• Lots of yoga. Lots and lots of yoga. I plan to re-connect with my home practice.
• Daily meditation.
• Flexibility. My kids are young. Things come up. Moods changes. Flexibility is key.

And there’s my game plan. Things to remember to keep me somewhat happy, somewhat connected to my children (and my spouse), and somewhat sane.

Minding my life

My daughter’s preschool end-of-year celebration was last night. It was wonderfully simple and while reminiscent of the year, fully embracing of the moment. Of that particular moment of transition. The end of one thing with full knowledge that something else is coming, but really no rush about this new thing—the future.

Kids are the masters of the current moment. There’s really nothing else for them. They certainly get excited about upcoming activities or birthdays, but when all is said and done, they’re all about what’s in front of them right now.

When do we lose this? When do we transition from full mindfulness to almost none? Media, test scores, parents talking about, “when you’re older.”  All of that and other things, I suppose. As adults it doesn’t really matter where it was lost. As parents, it matters and I feel a responsibility to try to maintain this mindfulness in my children a bit longer. Whether or not I’m succeeding, remains to be seen. But as adults, how can we find—again—this mindfulness. This appreciation of and attention to the present moment?

I struggle with this everyday. Perhaps struggle is the wrong word—and certainly not a positive way to look at this. I practice this everyday (yes, that’s better). The last couple of months have been very difficult for me—perhaps some of the hardest of my life—but coming back to the present moment has helped me get through it. Calming my mind. Stopping it from going on endlessly about the “what if’s.”  Just taking a deep breath. Looking at what is right in front of me.

**************

We’ll, this wasn’t quite the direction I had intended for this post. I was going to talk more about kids and transitions and something a tad more up-beat.  But there you have it. Fully embracing this moment and the need to get these words out.

I re-started my meditation practice this week. I’ve meditated for 5-10 minutes everyday this week. It’s such a nice way to start the day. To keep it slow and quiet before everything else enters the mind.

I really enjoy group meditation sits, but find that the timing isn’t always conducive to family time. Mornings seem to work best for me. But…if anyone is interested in local groups in the Sacramento area, check out the Sacramento Buddhist Meditation Group and their list of other groups in the region. It’s All Yoga also offers a Sunday evening sit that is really sweet. And Rise Yoga will be offering a beginning meditation series in July.

Namaste.

Summer

It’s almost here. The solstice is next week. School is almost out. The weather is finally warm. And I’m looking forward to the next  two and a half months.

For some time, I was really worried about how I was going to deal being with the kids so much. But then I realized that it’s not that much more time and it’s really no different from previous summers. It’s also going to be really nice not having a school schedule to follow. Our days are wide open.

I have, however, planned things for the summer. I need a plan and a rhythm and so do the kids. It’s full of lots of free time and some regular activities. Here’s our general schedule:

Mondays – Park mornings. Bennett went to the park every Monday during the school year with his Kindergarten class. I want to continue this. We’ll pick a different park every Monday. And some weeks we may substitute berry picking at a local u-pick farm.

Tuesdays – Kindergarten art group. I’m super excited about this. I organized this with some other moms from Bennett’s Kindergarten (Adelaide and other siblings will also participate). We’re all going to take turns hosting and organizing an art activity. It’ll be a good way to keep the kids–and moms–in touch through the summer.

Wednesdays – Wee Wednesdays at the Crocker Art Museum. I use to take Bennett to these regularly (before school conflicted with the dates). He really enjoyed the activities. Adelaide is now old enough as well.

Thursdays – Story time at the library and free library time. Both of my kids love the library but we’ve been unable to attend story times all year. Now’s the time. Adelaide may also be taking a dance class (she’s chomping at the bit to take ballet).

Fridays – Nothing planned.

Most of these activities occur in the morning. I like having free afternoons–given the heat here in Sacramento and our energy levels–giving the kids lots of time do do whatever they want. We also hope to be invited over for lots of pool play dates (I won’t name, names).

I’ve also started a list of art and other activities for the kids to do during some of these free times. Some of these activities include:

• summer journal
• block printing
• flower and petal collages
• murals on large pieces of paper

I’d love to have more ideas. What are you doing this summer?

Renewal

I recently spent four glorious days in New Hampshire. Without my family. With a bunch of women (and a sprinkling of men) that I had never met. It was glorious. Did I mention that? This was an art retreat called Squam—at Squam Lake. It was filled with fiber-inspired classes, lots of time for knitting, hiking, chatting, imagining, and soul-filling goodness. And it was exactly what I needed. Little did I know when I signed up for this workshop—clear across the country and an indulgence indeed—that it would be happening when I needed it most.

It was illuminating. It was inspiring. It was reinforcing.

The retreat of was filled with so many talented people, but it was the creativity that struck me. And the courage that all of these people have to be creative. To live creative lives. Everyone is creative, but creativity is so quickly misplaced as we grow older.  It’s taken me a long time to embrace being creative. Especially, when I question the worth and quality of what I create and compare it to others’ work. But none of that matters.  If my soul is telling me to create something—anything—I need to do it. It’s what I tell my kids and it’s what I’m increasingly telling myself.

So often, it’s the shoulds that rule my life. I should be home with the kids. I should clean the bathroom. I should mow the lawn. I should go for a run. Yes, these things are all important, but what if the needs ruled my life a bit more often. I need to walk today instead of run. I need to take a nap right now instead of pay the bills. I need to make popcorn for dinner instead of steak. I need to knit a few rows instead of cleaning up the kitchen. I need to photograph this flower. I need to create instead of produce. I need to listen to my soul. My spirit. And follow this path right now.

I’m finding that living a creative life is integral to my happiness.  I had been trying to carve out time to get creative, but failing miserably. Sure, I was doing a bit here and there, but it wasn’t enough and I knew it. Squam reminded me just how important it is to make the time. To embrace these urges and not look back.

I turned 36 a few weeks ago. Leading up to my birthday, I felt compelled to write a list of things to consider during this next year of my life. In no particular order:

-          No more self-doubt

-          Only honesty with myself

-          More self-care

-          Less guilt

-          More joy

-          Welcome spontaneity again

-          Embrace change and challenge

-          Move with purpose even when I don’t know or understand the purpose

-          Reach out more

-          Reclaim friendships

-          Smile more often

-          Love and trust with abandon

These things are important. Creating is a necessity. Living a passionate life is without question. Taking the time to remember these things is mandatory.

The Castle of Coffee

This is the name of the coffee shop Bennett and I created this morning. Bennett and I have a few hours to ourselves each week and we had gotten into the habit of stopping at a local coffee house for hot chocolate or juice (Bennett), chai (me), and a pastry (to share). We both really like doing this. Unfortunately, we can’t afford to do this on a weekly basis. Monthly maybe, but not weekly.

So…when Bennett mentioned visiting the coffee house this week, I informed him that we really couldn’t be doing this so often. He was disappointed until I suggested that we make our own coffee house. His eyes lit up, he started flapping his arms (he looks like a little bird trying to take off), and he said okay.

We bought some frozen berries to make muffins, I brewed a batch of chai, and Bennett made a nifty sign for our hangout:

Yes, the muffins are $6. We're a swanky joint.

 

Bennett declared the hot chocolate to be better than the coffee house’s, but he wasn’t as sure about the muffins. Not nearly enough berries, and well, I played with the flours a bit which always makes the muffins more of a surprise than anything (I, however, think they’re just fine).

All in all a success. Maybe not as fancy as a coffee house, but definitely less expensive. And most importantly, we were able to spend time together doing something we both enjoy.

T-11 days until spring

Because I live in Sacramento, counting down to spring isn’t a huge deal. It’s been spring–on and off–for the last few weeks. Margie–who’s from the Midwest insists that there are only 2 seasons in Sacramento–summer and spring.

Nonetheless, the official start of spring is approaching. Spring-inspired picture books (for the kids…ahem) have been requested from the library and more time is being spent outside prepping for spring planting and growth.

Our sheet mulching project seems to be doing well. The 3 piles of manure, newspaper, and leaves are smaller and flatter than they were a few months ago when we created them, telling me that some amount of decomposition is happening. We plan to build 3 raised beds around the mulched areas. We’re hoping to find some less expensive wood at the local Habitat for Humanity store to keep the cost of these beds down.

I’m feeling a renewed commitment to creating a cut flower section to our garden. The kids enjoy making bouquets and I love having fresh flowers in the house. This project has moved up on garden checklist and I hope to prep the area in March, as well.

I also want to plant a thorough herb and tea garden. I don’t like to spend money on herbs and loose leaf tea, especially when it’s so easy to grow your own. If I can figure out the watering system (or…rather, if Margie can), we’ll be good to go.

One thing that didn’t happen this winter, which we had planned to do, was the planting of many fruit trees. We did plant a blood orange tree, which seems to have survived the few frosty nights we experienced. We had hoped to plant a couple of kiwis and a satsuma mandarin as well, but they never quite made it into our budget. There’s always next winter.

And now…off to order seeds. Garden prep days have been scheduled for the last two weekends in March. We’ll build our raised beds and shovel in lots of top soil. The kids (and Margie and I) will be eager to plant as soon as the infrastructure is in place.

Neighborhood soup night

We hosted our first neighborhood soup night last night. Some friends of our have been hosting their own for a year or two. I’ve always loved the idea and finally took action and planned our own.

And…yay!…people came! We invited everyone on our block (and a few others) to come between 5pm and 7pm and to bring something to share. We provided split pea soup, some drinks, plates, and utensils.

The food was great…ranging from chips to lasagna to (a quite yummy) prune cake. The kids ran around playing. People talked and interacted. One of our neighbors brought his mandolin and played a few songs. There was interest in doing it again which was great news since we had already decided to keep doing this on a monthly basis.

I grew up in a small town where school and church dinners brought out a lot of the community. In a city–especially a city with an open enrollment policy for the city schools–neighbors don’t have as much encouragement to get to know one another and socialize on a regular basis.

This is unfortunate and something I want to change on my street, especially as my children become more independent and want to play in the front yard. I want to know my neighbors. I want my kids to know our neighbors and I want my neighbors to know who we are and where these two children belong (as well as the black dog that runs up and down the street without a collar or leash…but that’s another post).

We spend most of our time living next door to people we hardly know. In my neighborhood–where the houses are oriented to the backyard–we have to work to get people into their front yards so we can communicate and learn to care for one another.

After four years in our neighborhood, soup night was our first attempt to really open the door. We know our neighbors on all sides of us and across the street…and now we know a few more.